On my most recent trip to Manila, my sister and I ran through our possessions which are placed in cardboard boxes (nomad problems). I’ve realized one thing: I had a lot of notebooks! Those notebooks were used as journals or planners. I admit I still have this with writing my thoughts manually to this day. Running through the pages of my journals, there were consistent themes: I hate my life. I am not good enough. I am always the victim.Sadly, I still write these things written in my current journal.
As the authors of our lives, we are the ones in charge of the stories that we write. Unfortunately, we are not very reliable storytellers. Our life stories are based on our limited perspectives. But since these stories are what we feed ourselves, this is also what we exude to the world, and as such, we go through a self-fulfilling prophecy of affirming the stories we created about ourselves. Many of us end up being walking tragedies and heartaches.
What kind of story do you tell yourself? I admit mine has not been good. I write myself up as a victim of the situation, a loser in the genetic lottery, and a helpless human being. However, If I ask someone else to view my life, they would probably write it differently. We too have the capability of writing and sharing our stories. There isn’t way plot for us to follow, for it depends on how we see the situation and how we think it can turn around. So a lot of inner work and healing needs to be done before we can make a better or more accurate story of ourselves to share with the world. Positive affirmations are not my thing. There is still a considerable amount of mending to do. For now, I chose to write and share my life story as realistically and as neutrally as possible, so that I have room to write more positively about my journey in the future. I hold on to what Reese Witherspoon said in Adam Grant’s Work Life Podcast: The history of you getting it right should build your confidence.
A great resource in storytelling: How Changing your story can change your life – TED Talk by Lori Gottlieb: https://youtu.be/O_MQr4lHm0c
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